What is Litter? A Philosophical Tale

So tell the truth.

When you read the title of this lil' ole blog did you stop and go, "What the scoop?"

Well that's the same reaction I had when I read this letter:

Dear Stanley,

My owner just purchased a SmartScoop and we are all, like, tres excited. But then came the dénouement...we were tres perplexed as to the type of litter it would require. Help us, s'il vous plaît.

Ciao,

Persuadable Persian

Dénouement? Like, tres perplexed? Fan mail from a faux feline from France? And the worst part is, I know her. Her name's Peg and she's from Philly. And the closest she's been to french are the fries at McDonald's. Geez, get a column and everybody gets pretentious.

But the question is at least legit. And I'll restate it for those of you who don't speak wannabe: What kind of litter should I use with my SmartScoop? And the answer...

Dear Persuadable,

Use cat litter. More specifically, clumping cat litter. Don't use clay, non-clumping, pine- or newspaper-based litter. And don't use crystals or pearls. Seriously. Finally, don't go changin' to try and please me...sorry, but it was right there. I meant to say, don't go changin litter brands unless you absolutely have to. Nobody likes that.    

Did that clear up your tres confusion? You're not foolin anyone, you know?